What Do I Do If My Friend is Gay And He Likes Me
Friendship and love are two feelings that can be separated by a very fine line. Many arrows arise from the bond of friendship. However, the pain arises when the feeling is not returned and there is a rupture of expectations on both sides. Each circumstance and each story is concrete and specific.
In this DesiSoch article, we answer this question from a concrete perspective: “What to do when my friend is gay and he likes me?”. In this article, we give you the keys to act with assertiveness, empathy and active listening because while if you do not feel the same, you break your expectations, in the same way, you also feel sad at the idea of losing your friendship.
What do I do if my friend is gay and he likes me – how do I act?
- Listen to their feelings with respect and attention. This situation affects your friendship for the simple reason that when two people do not feel the same, both suffer because their expectations are different. Listening to your friend helps you to understand the meaning that he has been able to give to some of your gestures from his perspective of sentimental illusion.
- Express your feelings in a sincere and empathetic way. But it is important that, if you do not feel the same, clarify the situation and do not generate any kind of false expectations. You are both friends and you have the confidence to express your feelings. These ingredients are very important to promote complicity. Avoid overprotecting him with your words for fear of making him suffer. Express your feelings clearly, with respect but without detours.
- Keep a face-to-face conversation There are many forms of communication, however, the interaction of face-to-face communication is closer in this type of situation when two friends approach a conversation from different planes.
- Respect your decision. If you do not feel the same, it is important that you delegate to your friend the decision he wants to make about your friendship. For example, you may need to take some time away to cool your feelings and forget. In that case, although it hurts you to miss your friendship during this time, think about your well-being and what you need now. And if you have asked for this time, it is essential that you respect it and not look for the usual contact, because what for you is friendship, it confuses you.
- Show your willingness to continue with your friendship. It is very important that you value your relationship, especially if it is a bond in which you have shared many moments in common.
- Watch this situation temporarily. As in any friendship relationship, when a feeling of unrequited love arises, this breakdown of expectations affects both in one way or another. However, try to observe this situation in its present context. Analyze this situation from a growth mindset. This situation can help both of you to strengthen your friendship since it is a circumstance in which you can develop new personal resources to continue advancing in this link. A growth mentality is one that arises from the attitude of observing those situations that make you leave your comfort zone as a stimulus to evolve and grow inwardly. Over time, once the crisis is over, this situation can strengthen your friendship.
6 tips to maintain a friendship if your friend is gay and likes you
- Have confidence. All the moments that you both have lived are part of your life. You have a common history, an emotional attachment thanks to the trust you have built between them. In this situation, he trusts that, beyond this disappointment, he feels, at some point, he will feel ready to resume the friendship. Therefore, wait and be patient.
- Respect your space. Remember how you felt at some point in your life when suffering a lack of love. From this visualization exercise, try to empathize with your friend to understand how he feels with you.
- Avoid the feeling of guilt. It is normal for you to be sad to see your friend’s pain, however, you are not responsible for it. Try to repeat this message frequently when possible thoughts that concern you come to your mind.
- You are not your best confidant right now. If your friend is going to experience the symptoms of heartbreak now, understand that even if you want to help him, you are not the most appropriate person at this moment to offer him this emotional support. You remind him of his own pain.
- You will miss your friend. However, he accepts this longing as part of the process.
- Do not compare the past of your friendship with the present. The stories evolve. Live this reality from now on.
5 emotional intelligence tips if your friend is gay and he likes you
Now that you know what to do if your friend is gay and he likes you, take note of the following emotional intelligence tips:
- Do not change your attitude with him. You are still the same person as always. And him too.
- You can not control everything. For example, you can not predict how this story will evolve from now on. Do not be impatient.
Think positive.Surely sooner than you imagine, this friendship follows its usual rhythm.
Social plans Perhaps, your friend does not want an absolute distancing and decides to reduce the frequency of the plans.If you like, you can also propose this idea.
If you ask yourself: What do I do if my friend is gay and he likes me? Try to think about what advice you would give to someone else;who lived this circumstance.
This article is merely informative, On DesiSoch we do not have the faculty to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your case in particular.
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